literally.

I am often very skeptical as to whether or not certain people know the meaning of the word “literally.” I mean, if I hear you say “Oh my gosh, this soft pretzel is so freaking hot. Man, it just burned my tongue off. Like literally, my tongue has third degree burns,” well, then, at least in my mind, when you stick out your tongue, it better look like it’s been through trench warfare. But way too often, people use the word “literally” to describe statements that are actually the exact opposite. For instance, a man telling a story today at church said, “Literally, you could have cut the tension in that room with a knife.” Really? With a knife? I ‘d like to see someone literally cut an abstract concept like tension with a knife. I’d bet any attempt at so doing would just look like a crazy man walking through an already tense room thrusting a knife with seemingly no direction.

If we think about it, the soft pretzel patron should have said something to the effect of, “Like figuratively, my tongue has third degree burns.” That kind of verbal specificity and precision fosters genuine and trustworthy communication. And integrity of communication is a thing that is really important to me. Because when someone tells me that they have third degree burns on their tongue, and they stick out a tongue that for the most part looks like any old boring tongue, I am always disappointed.